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Best Poems From
HERBERT NEHRLICH
(04 October 1943)
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2433.
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Size Does
In a home for battered ones,
run by aseptic looking nuns
rings the wall-mount telephone
hubby wants to pick a bone.
Woman yells leave me alone
keep to yourself your tiny bone.
It never was what I expected
it is the reason I defected.
Hubby looks at his humdinger
it is bigger than a finger.
Tells his mate that life is tough,
girls can never get enough.
Herbert Nehrlich
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2434.
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Size Does Matter
Two men, named Engelbert and Rolf
were playing early morning golf.
To keep their mind and skills awake
they soon decided on a break.
Two coffin nails would taste just right
now all they needed was a light.
Big Engelbert said that his BIC,
twelve inch in length, would do the trick.
'Good God, where did you find this meanie? '
'It was a present from my Genie.'
'Well, where, if I may be so bold
can I, your buddie, get ahold
of such a wondrous, precious ghost? '
'He does reside (Bert had to boast)
inside my alligator bag, '
he grunted as he lit his fag.
The genie who had overheard
the conversation, word for word,
stuck out his head and said 'you've won
your private wish, but only one.'
Said Rolf, who needed a new Tux:
'Just let me have a million bucks! '
Great darkness now came to the sky
a million mallard ducks flew by.
Rolf used his fist and grabbed the shirt
of his old buddie Engelbert.
'I said a million BUCKS, not DUCKS
this genie really, truly sucks! '
Said Engelbert, 'well I agree
just think about it, look at me.
And do you think that I would pick
in middle age a twelve inch BIC? '
Written for my special friend Gina.
Herbert Nehrlich
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2435.
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Size Isn't All
She was exceedingly flat.
No fruit or other edible
could be used to describe,
in interpretative comparison
her chesty appendages.
No melon, apples, oranges,
eggs, walnuts, olives, peas,
but then it came to me,
eggs, sunny side up,
a bit scrambled perhaps.
Herbert Nehrlich
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2436.
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Skyline
And on the beach today
I saw an eagle.
Was flying in from just above the waves.
And, when he saw me he
began to shout.
His voice was swelling with,
what seemed like pride.
Well, then I saw it:
He was with fish,
a big one, too.
Was dragging down his wings
some as he flew.
How strange how Mother Nature
would assume,
that fish would want -
before he goes for dinner,
go for a ride
like birds
up in the sky!
He must have been a godforsaken sinner.
Herbert Nehrlich
Read more: fish poems, beach poems, pride poems, today poems, nature poems, mother poems, sky poems, fishing poems
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