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Best Poems From
HERBERT NEHRLICH
(04 October 1943)
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1981.
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Observed - Part III
Well, the fellow was known as O'Hara.
And the beauty was loved as Sweet Tara.
Once he barged in the room
like a grouch of a groom
and he helped her apply her Mascara.
Though you people would want to know all
was he handsome and dark, even tall?
Well, I MUST be discreet
so, whenever they meet
I have strawberry shakes at the Mall.
I suggest that imagination
would confirm your consideration.
You can see in your head
what those two do in bed.
So just stand there and give an ovation.
Herbert Nehrlich
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1982.
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Obsolescence?
You talk about those stoic stuffed auld goats
of times that boasted only lower classes,
in modern times, a free verse poet gloats
to me, they tend to talk straight from their asses.
I see, in modern poetry much huffing
so casual and shrill beyond compare
it is as if they'd beaten out the stuffing
of pigeon-chested crows while eagles dare.
Herbert Nehrlich
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1983.
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Obstetrics
And there it was that stupid little thing.
Training to be an obstetrician in this place
world's greatest took me under his left wing
but let me loose too early, 'just in case'.
A bush of hair is something pretty plain
in actuality I think all should be shaved
it would not matter one iota to her brain
today is sample taking day, samples are saved
for us to test them for rogue cells and other signs
of inflammation or discharge of foreign matter
back in the lab where, set among the pines
next to the shop that calls itself The Crazy Hatter.
We part the lips as they are called, to have a peek
put in the speculum and turn it very gently
the great professor stands behind me, what a freak
he looks like Dracula and drives a British Bentley.
It is plain modesty that tells me now to stop
but let me tell you that the purpose is for science
and to detect aberrant buggers and a crop
of those immortal ones that wallow in defiance.
It was a man with a humonguous Grecian name
it has been shortened to the more accepted Pap
he persevered with a hypothesis so tame
that even students saw the open, empty gap.
Today the test which is a rather simple smear
saves countless lives in many lands without much cost
it does prevent much needless suffering and the fear
that female cancer will make certain you are lost.
And so it is with some great heros of all time
they were soft spoken often nerdy, with bow ties
but they always thought inaction was a crime
if a single woman doesn't know and dies.
Herbert Nehrlich
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1984.
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Occult
They tested him,
of course they would,
had IBS, it bothered him,
then reflux which was worse,
three days he caught the stuff
in a small salad bowl,
occult it said,
and what it looked for
was the sap that makes you live.
Herbert Nehrlich
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